Talking to Providers

First of all, good job on making an appointment! It takes a lot of courage to go to a new doctor about a body area that may be uncomfortable to talk about. I am proud of you!

Second,

  • Make a list of your concerns. Are you experiencing a lot of nausea? Do you have night sweats? Weight loss? Bloody stools or blood on the toilet paper? Vomiting? Stomach pain? Rectal/anal pain? It may help to put this in your notes app on your phone or write it down

  • Consider bringing a friend, partner, or loved one for support and to help you process things. Strength in numbers!

  • The vast majority of the time, things like sex or sexual activity will not be brought up. It is up to you if you want to bring it up. It can be nerve-wracking, especially if you are unfamiliar or uncomfortable with your provider. It can be helpful to have your partner with you - or you may feel more comfortable talking alone!

  • If it is too uncomfortable or you are having trouble finding the words - see if you can email your questions to your IBD nurse or doctor.

Third,

  • The doctor will not perform anything like a colonoscopy or EGD (a scope of your upper gastrointestinal tract) on your first appointment - don’t worry about that! They may order blood work though, and perform an abdominal exam (where they feel your stomach and listen with a stethoscope - called auscultation).

  • Your doctor may perform what is called a DRE or digital rectal examination if your concerns are in your rectal/anal/bottom area or if you are having blood in your poop. This should not hurt, but it may cause dysphoria. Your doctor won’t rush you into things, will explain the steps of why they are performing the exam, and will make sure you are as covered as possible.

Last, but not least -

  • If you don’t feel like you were taken seriously, or treated differently or even not listened to at all due to being LGBTQ, please, please do not take that as a sign to stop seeking gastrointestinal care. 
  • There are gastroenterologists who will listen and care for you - sometimes it is harder to find them. The contact form below is the best way to reach me if you need help finding someone.
  • Use words that feel comfortable to you, whether that’s slang or medical terms. Whatever helps you get the message across! No one is judging your ability to speak like a doctor with many years of training.